Friday, September 11, 2009

My mind misgives some consequence yet hanging in the stars

Did you ever meet someone who made your antenna twitch? Not in a good way but in a 'there's something wrong here' way.

My old friend from school's fiance did that for me.
There was just something about his manner from the get go. A little something in his smile that rang insincere. Something a little too lively in his eyes as he appraised all her friends. Something a little bit 'master and servant' in his tone when he spoke to her.
And yet we don't make others choices, however much we adore them and it is a dangerous thing to raise a sense of unease to the lover. They do not like it, Sam I am, they do not like it one little bit.
Life has taught me to follow my instincts.
It sounds a bit naff and rather cocky to say that I'm somehow sensitive to things but I can be. I'm nosey in a different way to some and it makes me see somethings that are hiding in plain sight.
There's no satisfaction to it though because it doesn't tend to be fluffy stuff that's hiding in plain sight.

Lately one of my friends has been on my mind. She's on my watch list. Something is afoot with her. It's been coming a while. Thankfully she's stopped being brave about it and painting over it.
She's about to get some legal advice. Which is great. But I worry that this makes the chances of bad stuff greater.

I get a weird feel from someone otherwise sweet that I met recently.
I'm predisposed to be distrustful of him, I admit. People who think I'm instantly wonderful and gorgeous and want to see me all the time do that to me. It doesn't ring true.
That's not self deprecation on my part - I am totally rockingbird - I'm hip, I'm the funniest girl in Europe, I've got an ok face and great hair and my rack is second to none. I am well into my music, I do eat and belly laughing is totally the future.

But there's a something.
Like if I could just turn my head fast enough I'd be able to see what it is....

So take note of your gut feelings. They might be telling you what you already know really. Or something that you need to know.

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